Another day, another migraine

Today I woke up with a migraine. 

What a migraine is for me includes the following symptoms:
- light sensitivity
- pain behind my left eye
- pain in my jaw, mostly left side
- pain throughout my head, mostly on the left side
- the desire to insert objects into my skull in an attempt to relieve the pressure in my head
- tiredness (but this is almost a constant in my life)
- differing levels of nausea (not always, but yes for today) 

I am currently at the beginning of Day 4 of 5 of an R course. Reflecting over my life there is definitely some correlation between the two, but what evidence is there to support that this R course is the causation of this migraine?

- R is computer software, therefore I have been sitting at a desk on a computer for several days straight (Sedentary +, Posture -)
- I am not technologically inclined. Statistics and programming is a steep and stressful learning curve (Anxiety +)
- I need time in nature to replenish my energy. Doing this course means I have only had one break a day to go outside. (Anxiety +, Tiredness +)
- There was a public holiday this week, therefore my usual yoga class was canceled (Sedentary +)
- The public holiday also meant the uni was closed, but I still had to come into campus where the kitchens were locked so I could not heat up my food in the usual place,  I could not drive into campus through the usual gate. These things added time to finding a way in/out of campus and looking for a kitchen could get into (Anxiety +)
- I am in a room full of humans all day every day, regardless of what I am doing this situation drains my energy superfast, likely increased by my autism (Anxiety +, Tiredness +)
- The desk space I have here does not allow me to see the projected screen while facing my own screen face on, this leads to constantly having to correct my posture once I realise I am twisting (Posture -)

Anxiety and tiredness, a sedentary lifestyle, and bad posture are common contributing factors that can lead to migraines. 

Taking into account the usual weekly problems I face, the addition of this extra anxiety and tiredness, as well as the increased sedentary lifestyle and bad posture, it would be fair to conclude that my participation in this R course contributes a large part to the onset of my current migraine.

Why start Academia against the odds?

Hello world, I am a first-year PhD student looking into rainforest ecology. 

I often find myself questioning why I am doing my PhD. Some might say this it is normal to question what you are doing, list the pros and cons of continuing and make a decision. However, I question myself on a daily basis, sometimes several times a day. I feel as if this is a little bit more often than usual.

I am constantly reminded that I face many challenges in my career, especially going into academia.

- I come from a low socioeconomic background,

- I am the first in my family to complete any university degree, 

- I get regular migraines,

- I am a partial carer for disabled adults in my family, 

- I am diagnosed as being on the Autism spectrum, 

- I have Generalized anxiety disorder, 

- I am known to get depression, 

- and there is ADHD in my family, so I likely have some of these traits as well.

Despite all of this I also know that these challenges won't go away and my questioning of what I'm doing will remain regardless of what I am actually doing.

I am starting this blog as a way to acknowledge and recognise what is going on inside my head, and to help me work through, what I will likely refer to as 'my madness' in future posts. 

I used to blog as a teenager and in my early 20's and found it helped me to process things and to stop bottling it up inside. 

So here's to my early-mid 30's self-help blog?